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Elves are a group of sapient and near-sapient bipedal apes capable of stepping. They are known for their carnivorous diet; some have evolved to hunt other stepping humanoids, like trolls and even other elves, and in the modern day some will hunt isolated or wounded humans. All elf species are on a spectrum of intelligence between that of chimpanzees and humans, and many use rudimentary tools like stone blades[1] or wooden stick-clubs.[2]

Elves’ real hunting prowess comes from their incredible stepping ability. They attack from the rear,[3] and will sometimes toy with their prey while hunting.[4] They are capable of sizing up their prey, stepping into the next-door world, and then stepping back perfectly placed with their arms around their prey’s throat or holding a stone blade about to jab into their opponent’s eye.[5][6] However, they do eat foods other than meat; some are known to dig in the mud for roots, worms, and molluscs.[7]

Elves appear to be more individualistic than humans and trolls. When they fight in groups, they don’t organise as a single force; rather, each elf fights each opponent alone, in a series of concurrent private duels.[8] In elf culture, intervening in one of these duels, even if it is to save someone’s life, is seen as shameful.[9] They are still social, however, and are known to collaborate to defend their young.[10]

Elves are found most often in the High Meggers, and are much rarer in the lower worlds.[2] They aren’t really found beyond The Gap, and presumably the East Gap, for fear of stepping through the empty vacuum.[11] They are generally wary of human settlements, and will only attack humans out of desperation[12] or if they see an isolated or wounded human as potential prey. Some human colonies call elves “greys”, after their resemblance to old American alien sightings.[2]

Evolution[]

The ability to step first evolved several million years ago in Homo habilis, a bipedal ape that utilised stone tools.[13] Stepping is hypothesised to be linked to the higher intelligence, specifically the capacity for imagination, found in the Homo genus. It may be linked to planning and forethought: perhaps the ability to imagine alternative outcomes depending on whether you risk hunting a large animal or fall back on a reliable fish-filled river is linked to the ability to imagine how another world in the Long Earth might be different from your own. Or, it might be related more directly to tool use: the ability to imagine the changes needed to turn a stone into a handaxe, and then to go ahead and do this with your own two hands, might be linked to the ability to imagine how you might travel into another world, and then do it yourself.[14]

The ability to step appears to have evolved only once, on the Datum Earth.[15] After this, a rapid divergence occurred. Those habilines that were better at stepping quickly moved away from the Datum and out across the Long Earth, radiating out into many different niches and becoming the elves, the trolls, and other kinds of humanoid, like the seal-beasts on Earth west 1,300,000 plus change.[16][17] Some humanoids, once they found a lush Earth to settle down on, secondarily lost their ability to step; the bonobo chimp is hypothesised to be a kind of stepping humanoid that travelled back to the Datum Earth and then lost the ability to step, stranding the species there.[18]

On the other hand, those early Homo habilis that weren’t as good as stepping or couldn’t step at all stayed on the Datum Earth, never even leaving to begin with. This group gave rise to all the human relatives we know from the fossil record, like the Neanderthals, and eventually to humans.[14] This explains why humans are not as good at stepping as elves and other humanoids.

Kobolds[]

Kobolds are a kind of elf whose evolution has been shaped by contact with humans. To make deals with and compete with humans, they are believed to have evolved traits like higher intelligence and the ability to physically speak human languages. Despite this, they are highly secretive.[19] Kobolds are best known for their habit of trading, both for knowledge and for certain items that they want. They are also called ringtails, or in England, urban foxes.[20]

Physiology[]

Despite being humanoids, kobolds are often compared to moles. With robust hands and feet good for digging, and a seeming aversion to sunlight, some have speculated that they evolved underground before returning to the surface.[21][22] As well as stepping, they are also able to use soft places to travel long stepwise distances quickly.[23]

Kobolds are about four feet tall, with a squat, robust build. Their feet are human-like, but have talon-like toenails that can kill someone with a single kick.[24] Their faces look like a chimpanzee’s or baboon’s,[25] with ears folded flat and human-like hair that can be made into a punk-rock hairstyle. Their teeth are sharp and triangular, and they can laugh,[25] hiss,[23] cackle,[26] and scream.[27] They grin for a variety of reasons, including nervousness and fear.[28][29]

Society[]

Kobold society is organised around trading. Many are collectors, fascinated with the material goods of other species, and will trade to amass their own personal collection of whatever objects they’re most interested in. They don’t appear to be capable of creating complex tools or objects of their own, so they will obtain these from other species.[22][23] They will also wear clothing obtained in this way.[21][29] Kobolds also trade in rumours and information, and will sell what they know to the highest bidder.[30]

Kobolds evolved alongside humans, and still often trade with them in the modern day. They are known to approach humans in High Meggers communities like New Springfield,[31] but will only rarely come down into the Low Earths.[32] They will also trade with other humanoid species,[33] and with other kinds of sapient entirely, like the beagles. They have sold beagles a variety of human technologies and domesticated animals, including rabbits,[34] dogs,[35] stapling tech,[36] wheels, and even iron-making.[34]

Kobolds are sometimes seen in groups, and sometimes alone.[37][29] When they fight, they do so without weapons; grappling means their opponents can’t step without taking them stepwise as well, and they don’t need weapons anyway, as kobolds’ sharp toenails can disembowel with a single kick.[37]

Greys[]

Greys are the name given to a kind of humanoid seen by teenage Helen Green in a joker world in the Mine Belt. They are small and orange, and look like hairy little children. They have big eyes, like cartoon aliens.[38]

Lollipops[]

Lollipops are a kind of elf that Joshua Valienté encountered on Earth West 139,171 during The Journey. They are about five feet tall, skinny, and coated with hair. Their faces are strangely human-like, despite their flat, chimp-like noses, and their heads are massive; their craniums appear stretched, with brains bigger even than those of humans. Their eyes are large and slanting, alien-like, but completely brown and lacking the whites of a human eye.[39]

Humans and their relatives are limited in how large their heads and brains can ever grow, because they must be small enough to pass through the cramped humanoid pelvis during birth. Lollipops have evolved a new way around this problem. Instead of ever passing through the birth canal, lollipop babies simply step out of the womb and into the next world over. They are social, and relatives wait in the stepwise world to help lollipops during their birth.[40] Despite this huge increase in the size of their brains, the lollipops are less intelligent than many of their relatives. Other kinds of elves will in fact farm lollipops for their brains, which must be rich in fat and protein.[41]

Many decades after The Journey, a group of Next managed to figure out which gene complex gave the lollipops their unique heads and birthing process, and spliced these genes into two Next embryos that would eventually become Ruby and Ronald.[42]

Hog-riding elves[]

This kind of elf was encountered by Joshua Valienté on an Unspecified West post-Corn Belt Earth (2) during The Journey. They look like child gymnasts, with graceful, strong, bodies covered in rust-brown hair. Their arms are proportionally long, and look like they could be useful climbing trees, and they have small, chimp-like faces. They make pant-hoot noises like chimpanzees, whooping when excited, and will bare their human-like teeth and hiss at their prey.[43]

These elves appear to hunt in groups of males, and are known to target isolated humans as prey. They will toy with their prey, expertly stripping humans of their defensive weapons before they attack. They use stone blades while hunting, and are also known to bite their prey.[43][44]

They appear to have domesticated or semi-domesticated a kind of hog-like animal which they ride while hunting. They direct these mounts forward by kicking them in the ribs. These beasts are huge, as tall as a man at the shoulder, with robust legs and bristling humped backs. Their eyes are small and black, and they have canine teeth embedded in the end of their long snouts. They make guttural grunting sounds.[45]

Sword-wielding elves[]

This kind of elf was encountered by Joshua Valienté on Earth West 110,719 during his 2040 search for the trolls. They are a little taller than a man, but look taller than they are due to their thin bodies. Their skin is grey, and they have ash-blonde hair worn Afro-style. They have been seen wearing short fur tunics, and hunt with long, thin, double-blades made of wood. They are described as ugly, their faces a network of wrinkles, and eyes that seem to glow green. Their ears are long and pointed like a traditional elf’s, but constantly flick back and forth, searching for sounds.[46]

They are also known to hunt isolated humans. They hunt and fight in groups, and have been seen fighting a group of kobolds.[47]

Singers[]

Singers are a kind of humanoid (it’s not clear if these are actually elves) encountered by Joshua Valienté and Rod Valienté on Earth West 1,520,875 during Joshua’s last sabbatical. They are huge, sleek, covered in muscle, and said to look like an otter. They are effective in water, with streamlined fur, able to slide around smoothly on their belly; however, they are also fast runners, with comparatively small forearms,[48] and are even good at climbing trees.[49] They have red mouths full of alligator-like teeth, and a strange dangling organ at the backs of their throats.[48] They are also able to utilise soft places to travel millions of worlds out to the tall tree worlds like Earth West 230,000,000 plus change.[49]

Singers are named for their unique method of hunting trolls. They are able to mimic troll song- not with the complexity of true troll singing, but well enough to trick troll cubs into believing they aren’t as far away from their parents as they actually are. They hide in water, like a crocodile, and when a troll cub is both sufficiently close to the water and separated from other trolls, they lunge out of the water and strike.[50] They are also known to prey on humans, if the opportunity presents itself.[51] When their prey is secured, they use soft places to quickly travel far away from the prey’s family. Singers are known to keep their prey alive for days at a time, frequently hitting it on the head to keep it unconscious.[52]

The Long Earth[]

In 2030, the elves were one of the species fleeing West to escape the migraines caused by First Person Singular.[53][54]

During the Journey, Joshua Valienté and Lobsang visited a settlement established by the First Heavenly Church of the Cosmic Confidence Trick Victims, on Earth West 139,171. They had been attacked by a group of elves, who had left no survivors.[53]

On the same world, Joshua encountered a band of elves of a different species - these were the type with the oversized cranium. He witnessed a pregnant female give birth.[53]

On an Earth past the end of the Corn Belt, Joshua was attacked by half a dozen elves that were mounted on huge hogs. They were of a simmilar breed to the ones that killed the Cosmic Confidence Trick Victims.[55]

The Long War[]

In 2040Joshua Valienté and Bill Chambers met with Finn McCool (a kobold) on Earth West 110,719. Joshua and Finn, as well as other kobolds, fought against a group of tall elves here.[56]

References[]

  1. The Long War- page 289
  2. 2.0 2.1 2.2 The Long Earth- page 354
  3. The Long Earth- page 361
  4. The Long Earth- pages 244-245
  5. The Long Earth- page 246
  6. The Long War- page 290
  7. The Long War- page 288
  8. The Long Earth- page 248
  9. The Long War- pages 332-334
  10. The Long War- pages 289-290
  11. The Long Mars- page 156
  12. The Long Earth- pages 230-231
  13. The Long War- page 323
  14. 14.0 14.1 The Long Earth- page 327
  15. The Long Earth- page 263
  16. The Long Earth- page 269
  17. The Long Earth- page 327
  18. The Long War- pages 325-326
  19. The Long War- page 324
  20. The Long War- page 319
  21. 21.0 21.1 The Long War- page 318
  22. 22.0 22.1 The Long War- page 325
  23. 23.0 23.1 23.2 The Long War- page 328
  24. The Long War- page 332
  25. 25.0 25.1 The Long War- page 329
  26. The Long War- page 348
  27. The Long War- page 333
  28. The Long War- page 450
  29. 29.0 29.1 29.2 The Long Utopia- page 114
  30. The Long War- page 352
  31. The Long Utopia- page 43
  32. The Long Utopia- page 115
  33. The Long War- pages 327-328
  34. 34.0 34.1 The Long War- page 360
  35. The Long War- page 367
  36. The Long War- pages 446-447
  37. 37.0 37.1 The Long War- pages 331-332
  38. The Long Earth- page 136
  39. The Long Earth- pages 232-233
  40. The Long Earth- pages 234-235
  41. The Long Earth- page 355
  42. The Long Cosmos- page 127
  43. 43.0 43.1 The Long Earth- pages 244-245
  44. The Long Earth- page 250
  45. The Long Earth- pages 243-244
  46. The Long War- pages 330-331
  47. The Long War- pages 330-332
  48. 48.0 48.1 The Long Cosmos- pages 246-249
  49. 49.0 49.1 The Long Cosmos- page 314
  50. The Long Cosmos- pages 246-247
  51. The Long Cosmos- page 249
  52. The Long Cosmos- page 325
  53. 53.0 53.1 53.2 The Long Earth - Chapter 28
  54. The Long Earth - Chapter 44
  55. The Long Earth - Chapter 30
  56. The Long War - Chapter 45
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